Mach Surf Weekend

My children, let me tell you a story, so buckle up cuz’ it gon’be a hard ride (not quite as hard as being in the car with Jenny but still);

As the cold howling wind swept the leaves from the ground, freshers and old members alike waited in anticipation for what was yet to come. As all the gear was getting ready by the dark shed, obscure stories of past years were unveiled. Rumours about what tradition demanded spread amongst the panicked freshers. In this adventure in the unknown, only the elder members could guide us through it all.

And so it was that we all set sail to Machrihanish (yes I will use the whole name).

Almost everyone got into the safe, warm minibuses, except a group of 5. Us 5 damned souls were forsaken to roam the Earth in a cute red little car. Or as I would like to call it. T h e W a g o n o f D e a t h . I have heard hellish stories about trips on minibuses, their lack of space and sewage scent are deadly amusing. However, I am still to find a story about a road trip as eerie and disturbing as the one we experienced on Jenny’s car. Even Great Western Road become a labyrinth not even Kirsty-the-leader could escape from. As we fled the torturous Glasgow traffic we were engulfed by the darkness of the rural world. And so it happens that I, the only non-driving-licence-holder, naïve as could be, was the unaware co-pilot of the dangers lying up ahead. We encountered roundabouts where angry drivers gave us the finger (I wonder why) and deer-by-the-road. Yet nothing could compare to the moment where Jenny thought she had ran over something/someone. Maybe if we hadn’t all screamed hysterically when we ran over a pothole, Jenny would have remained guilty-free. (Okay I’ll admit the poor creature was concerned about the tires).

Once we miraculously arrived unharmed, we spread our sleeping mats and welcomed the first night. It was a wonderfully unplanned gathering, a preview of what was yet to come.

Bonding games that may have bonded some people way too much. And let’s not forget the lovely scene of our wonderful social sec and trip sec downing their drinks. It was a spectacle for the senses. A spectacle difficult to remember in the midst of alcohol consumption.

Dawn awoke, fresh and rosy-fingered. Everyone seemed in a rush to get ready (or maybe that’s how I saw it from the inside of my sleeping bag). Motivated by the music, we went to the beach. Once again, the Wagon of Death got lost on its way and stopped by a mountain of freshly picked turnips (the size of those books you never buy for your course). Hugh rushed towards the Turnip Offering and took one. And so it was that we set off with a rotten turnip (great decision making boi HAHA). While Jenny insisted on it having magical properties, my wetsuit was nowhere to be seen when we got to the beach. The Cursed Turnip was to blame.

Everyone seemed very keen to get in the water despite it being freezing lol. And oh boy, was it impressive what they all did (yer welcome). I mean, look at that Cinnamon surfing HA. It wasn’t until they got out that many envied Ella and Nick, all wrapped up in their warm clothes. At least we could all warm our hearts by the fire of the young love blooming by the wine-dark sea.

It wasn’t until the clock struck midevening that we again enjoyed the bittersweetness of the fermented apples of the land. Strange things happened. Faint glimpses of salad-ravaging monsters scooping hummus with their hooves (sorry about that Becky), forbidden flesh flashing like ripe peaches under the devil’s roof. The hall felt like the inside of a kettle: hot and steamy, water dripping from the spout. Frantic struggles over whose foot was left undressed and bags of wine flying through the air. It truly was a magical night.

The next morning was colder than the previous one. So let’s just say many of our brave members decided to look after their bodies. Except Jenny and Felicie?!!? The hell were you thinking when you got in the water with no wetsuit. Now that’s the courage this club is made of.

So bit by bit, everyone got comfortable in their cosiest clothes and drove back to our sunny sunny Glasgow, where we sure know many adventures are still to come.

Disclamer: Jenny’s car ride was actually amazing, many thanks to her being such a wonderful been and also to everyone in the car. I hope you all had as much fun as I did. Embrace your inner weirdness!!

Lucas xxx